Hands up perfect parents?
No, of course not. No one’s perfect in this parenting malarkey. In fact, I’d go so far as to say most of us are just muddling through as best we can. High-fiving ourselves each night for surviving. I know this. I do. Yet, as I’m on this blogging journey I find myself following more and more social media accounts that perhaps give the illusion of perfection. Social Media is a platform for us to showcase what we want. And there are A LOT of very talented people out there who have amazing photography skills and who’s pictures make you just want their life. We know it’s not real, but we get sucked in anyway. This isn’t about to turn into a bitching session by the way. I love and follow a fair few ‘pretty’ accounts. But, it’s good to remind ourselves that we’re all real people with real lives. Unless you’re Beyoncé of course.
So, in the interests of ‘keeping it real’, I thought I’d let you in on some of my parenting fails. So here goes, my confessions….
- I don’t wash the kids faces nearly enough. I’d say a good 90% of the time we get by on a quick once over with a baby wipe.
- I get so bored of the ‘go back to the bathroom and wash your hands’ argument with T that I pretend to believe him half the time when he says he’s done them.
- I’ve seen the kids munching away on snacks that have been in their car seats for god knows how long and are likely sprouting new parts.
- I regularly suck little L’s dummy to get the dirt off.
- It’s usually about 2 weeks after I tell myself that all the bed sheets need changed that I actually do them.
- I rely on the other school mums I know (my saviours and great new friends) to tell me when I’ve to hand money in, complete a form, bring a toy for show and tell, attend a parents meeting or be at school early for something or other.
- I regularly lie about what time it is when I want T to go to bed early. Or indeed if he thinks he’s been able to stay up late.
- I’ve ‘borrowed’ money from T’s piggy bank and not paid it back.
- I often hide in the kitchen to eat the chocolate I’ve sneakily bought and don’t want to share with them.
- I lose my shit pretty regularly and make idle threats of banning technology, early bed times, toys being taken away, activities being cancelled and so on. All the while telling myself off for being too strict.
- I’m pretty rubbish at imaginary play and can only last a matter of minutes pretending to be some kind of animal before I’m bored.
- I look at my phone far too much.
- I tell off the husband for looking at his phone far too much. Conveniently forgetting point 12.
- I use technology as my unpaid babysitter.
- I tell off the husband for using technology as the unpaid babysitter. Conveniently forgetting point 14.
I could go on and on. I did actually. Then I realised I was even boring myself so I called it quits at an even 15.
So, I’m not perfect. And I know this because (despite telling others we shouldn’t be feeling guilty for every last thing, and even writing a post about it) I feel guilty an awful lot for what I perceive as my failings as a mum.
Wait just a minute…
I might hate imaginary play but I blinking love a bit of Lego, colouring in, baking (I say love, this in no way implies I’m any good at it), outdoor exploring, park play, singing (see earlier note about enjoyment and talent not marrying up) and reading. I always ask them both about their day, read them a bedtime story, listen to their nonsense and laugh on cue.
I might hide my chocolate and borrow money from their piggy banks, but I always come back from the supermarket on payday with something they totally don’t need. Usually an overpriced magazine with a piece of tat stuck to it that’s broken before we’re back at the car.
I might hide away on Facebook for too long or let them watch nonsense on the iPad too often, but I do also use my phone to take little sneaky pictures of them when they’re being cute. And they might watch too much crap for my liking but I also make a big deal about having a family movie night – when I actually do let T stay up late and we watch something together. Not someone opening a Kinder Egg on You Tube. I might be grumpy more than I really should. But actually, I often plaster a fake smile on after a long day at work and pretend to be in a great mood, just for them.
This brings me back to my first point. There’s no perfect parent. I know I’m not. Now you also know I’m not! Who cares. Let’s love them, do our best, pat ourselves on the back for all the things we do well and accept the things we don’t do so well at. As long as they go to bed knowing they’re loved that’s the most important thing. That, and Gin!
Thanks for reading, and if you’re in the mood for confessing feel free 🙂