Why I Can’t Find Any Christmas Glee

Heyyyy, remember me?

It’s December! The time for Christmas Glee. The time in which bloggers share their gift guides and post beautiful pictures of their Christmas tree, or their little ones in cute reindeer jumpers, or having a lovely family day out meeting Santa in the local grotto.

Me? It’s been a month since I’ve written anything. A good couple of weeks since I posted on Facebook or Twitter and though I’ve been updating Instagram, it’s been sporadic and pretty half-hearted if I’m honest.

I’ve kind of lost my blogging mojo.

There’s been so much going on that I feel so lethargic and at a bit of a loss about what to write. I don’t have any Christmas cheer yet! And because I do enjoy a ‘5 reasons why’ and ‘top tips’ kind of post and just writing a bit about my life doesn’t seem quite right.

It’s boring!

And won’t score me many points on the old Google rankings front.

F**k it, I’ve nothing to write about except the things that have been going on in real life so I guess it’s better than a big black hole of nothingness!

First up – I QUIT MY JOB!

So this has been in the pipeline for quite a while. I’ve been hankering for working more flexibly, being around more for the kids and having a bit more of a variety in my work. The blog has been going pretty well and there’s potential for there to be a bit of extra cash to be made here. (I see the irony of this after working my ass off to increase my presence, and then ignoring it all.) Alongside this I have wanted for a while to work in a freelance capacity but was basically just a bit too scared to take the leap. So I plodded along for longer than I should have as my job was well paid and I was able to work the hours I wanted.

Also, being slap bang in the middle of renovating a house, it didn’t seem the right time. However, it’s like having children isn’t it? There’s no perfect time. There’s just a time and when it happens you make it work for you.

So I finished at my work a week ago and have been spending the days I would have been in paid employment doing all the prep work required to be a self-employed person as well as project managing and painting the house. Not a patch on the hours the husband is putting in as he is at the house most evenings and weekends while I’m at home with the kids.

But still, I’m tired.

The weekends have been going by in a blur with not much quality time spent together.

We’re living off Mc’ds, pizza, and, when we’re being ‘healthy’ – freezer tapas with peas chucked in for some colour.

And there’s Christmas to think about. I can’t muster any excitement. Though I’m desperate to be in the house by Christmas. Is that irony too? God knows, I’m too tired to know what irony means anymore.

I think if the impossible happens then Alan and I will be in a frazzled heap on the couch, minus a tree, or presents, or energy to get through the rest of the month but maybe we’ll feel like we’ve won some kind of victory against the nay-sayers. We’re kind of stubborn like that!

Anyway, we’re ploughing on this week and will assess at the weekend if it’s worth killing ourselves for another week if we’re not going to make it in for Christmas. We don’t really want to have lost the run up to the big day and not even have anything to show for it.

If you see some great Insta-worthy interiors shots soon then hurrah, we’ve done it. If you just see me posting more pictures of my kids eating ice creams, or holiday shots from 2 years ago, then you’ll know that we’re still going at it hammer and tongs in the hope of being in our own home for Christmas, whilst simultaneously spending very little time actually together with our kids!

So that’s that. the dullest of dull, whiny updates.

There’s no point in lying though and pretending that it’s anything like as fun as it sometimes seems on the telly. It’s not. And we’ve not got an endless pot of cash like they always seem to have on Grand Designs. What we do have is one builder who’s done about 80% of the work by himself and now has me in his ear every day about why this, that and the next thing isn’t finished. He hates me. But I do bring him selection boxes, so maybe he just strongly dislikes me now.

And before anyone starts any nonsense about how lucky we are, I totally know that this post is very ‘first world problems’!

I know how lucky we are to be able to do this project.

I know how lucky we are to have a welcoming roof over our heads while we do it.

I know how lucky we are that our children are happy, healthy, and settled here at their grandparents.

I’m very grateful for all of that.

But, that all being said…..I WANT TO LIVE IN MY HOUSE, NOW!!!!

Cx

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